Banging Your Head Against the Glass: The Real Reason You’re Stuck With Discipline
Most men are like a fly trying to get out of a closed window with their training and nutrition.
“I just need more discipline.”
“I need more motivation.”
So they try harder and harder, using all their willpower…
Making a little progress, only to go backwards again — burnt out and overwhelmed.
I was once like this too. I’d read Goggins’ books and try to motivate myself by calling myself lazy, undisciplined, and a pussy. But it only led to more shame, avoidance, and less action.
What most men don’t realise is that there’s an open window right beside them.
The fly (you) doesn’t need to keep smashing its head against the glass.
You need to develop strong motives, build skills, and have the right support in place so you can finally fly out the open window.
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
That’s why you see men start before summer… and stop as soon as it ends.
Because they never built deeper motives to change.
Think about motives like a location you’re travelling to.
“Summer” is just one destination. But once that trip is over, what keeps you moving forward?
This is important to think about. (If you want some questions to help you dig deeper into this, drop me a message on Instagram and I’ll send you a worksheet.)
A few of my new clients have said to me:
“I want this to be a lifestyle change. I want to be the man who shows up with high levels of self-respect and sets a good example for those around me.”
I love that goal. But before coaching, they weren’t acting in line with it.
The man you want to become is driven by alignment, respect, and high standards.
He regulates fear and responds to it, rather than reacting.
Reacting to fear looks like:
Skipping meals
Fasting to make up for binges
Restricting only to binge again
Banning foods unnecessarily
Over-exercising to “burn off” food
Overthinking every meal and calorie
Setting unrealistic targets you can’t sustain
Here’s the contrast:
Keep reacting to fear and you’ll stay trapped in cycles of yo-yo dieting, burnout, and frustration.
Operate from respect and alignment, and you’ll finally build a body and mindset you’re proud of — one that lasts.
Life is stressful enough without piling on these extra stressors.
That’s why in Resilience 90, we work on managing these fears so you can operate from respect — and finally break the yo-yo cycle that keeps most men stuck, unhappy, and not living up to their potential.
Because here’s the truth: it’s easier than ever to get a meal plan, your macros, and a program online.
But do you know why men are still stuck?
Because they need the mindset to succeed.
They need to build emotional intelligence.
They need a true understanding of self-sabotage.
They need support and tools to overcome motivation and discipline issues.
They need someone to help them navigate the challenges that come up.
If you liked this article, let me know what you related to or what made sense to you.
And as a reminder — if you drop me a message, I’ll send you that worksheet on motives.